Today was a little rough. It was definitely one of those days I wish I could restart and have a second try at. In the middle of a terribly busy and demanding day, I heard the faint sound of a few tiny drops of glass beads hitting the floor. As I looked down, a multitude of beads crashed to the ground and scattering across the room as my entire necklace broke and fell into hundreds of pieces. Ugh, really?
God is good, even today, I remind myself.
It is extremely busy in our office. In the primary elections, it was determined that my employer would not be serving another term in office. Since then, several changes have come about resulting in a number of others leaving as well—one of which I’ve always looked up to and considered somewhat of a mentor figure. Our office is in a major time of transition. Everything will settle down in time , but this period of transition is so challenging.
Today I found out that another person I look up will be leaving, and he’s one of the two attorneys I work directly for. Reality is sinking in that I will not escape the waves of change surging through the office. This individual was offered an excellent opportunity that he couldn’t decline. In fact, all of the folks who are leaving are going on to fantastic new adventures that will greatly benefit their families. I’m so, so happy for all of them. It’s wonderful to see others blessed!!
So, I fought back the bummed out feelings and leaky eyes to congratulate him and celebrate his family’s blessing. I admit, I had to try a little harder today to keep a smile on. So many great people are leaving, and much like my pretty pink necklace I saw scattered across my office floor, the group of people I’ve been working with for so many years is no more.
The nitty gritty aspect of so much change in such a short period of time has hugely increased my work load. I’m working a minimum of forty-eight to fifty hours a week, and I’m voluntarily absorbing the overtime rather than accruing comp time. Right now I feel like it’s the right thing to do to honor my employer and supervising attorneys, but I’m exhausted. My two attorneys are absorbing the work of five attorneys, which means I’m nearly drowning in case work.
I’ve been in the office for over nine years, so I feel like I’m efficient and capable of handling more than my share of work. This is just SO MUCH. When I finally asked for help, I feel like it didn’t go over well with everyone despite my supervising attorneys and their supervising attorney all agreeing that others would need to share the work load. Ugh! It’s frustrating, and to be completely honest, it hurts my feelings. There just doesn’t seem like a lot of team spirit in this time of transition, and the combination of work load and change in atmosphere is really bringing me down.
I mean, you know me, I love my job. I love working in this office, I love a good challenge, and I’m more than happy to put in extra hours with a smile, but at some point even I have to scream out “UNCLE!”
So today as I digested the news from one of my supervising attorneys and juggled a number of top priority rush projects, I felt a little overwhelmed.
At the end of the day, I’m blessed to be in such a fantastic position. We are very well taken care of, and we want and need for nothing. It feels like I’m losing people I admire, but in reality God is merely expanding my professional relationships by providing a new group of individuals I will inevitably learn from and even admire.
A pretty little necklace that I love broke and scattered into hundreds of pieces, but life goes on. Long sigh… God is good.
28 You are my God, and I will praise you;
you are my God, and I will exalt you.
his love endures forever.